TGIC #5

Well, I ain't gonna lie, it's been a good long while since I've posted in this regard. Not that the number on this here TGIC would lead you to believe I've been so silent as I might imply. Admittedly – and interestingly – I haven't exactly felt as though that which needs saying hasn't been said, what with LeftD holding down the fort in such a superlative manner in my (and Righty...he'd gnaw on our collective leg were I to forget him) absence. Hades, his pull list all but perfectly reflects the various changes and challenges posed by the big two in the past few months (when was the last time you envied someone for a pull list including both New Avengers and Captain America?). Nonetheless, I've been quiet for quite long enough and have a thing or two to, ever so briefly and in a split infinitive manner, say...

I think the duology, as a certain someone has described Marvel and DC, may have jumped the shark. Yes, they now can pull off yearly events and, yes, they are now able to pull off the “perpetual” yearly event (52, Countdown, the revised Spiderman [and I have no idea which book this applies to, still], etc.). Furthermore, both companies now have the talent (BENDIS!, ..., ..., hmm, well, BENDIS! and so on, I suppose) to pull off such extravaganzas. OK, ain't gonna knock that unless I have to...and I really ain't had to quite yet.

Nonetheless...WTF??? I'm very much in support of easter eggs and the like, but you seriously expect us not to be pissed about, or at the very least wary of, a company-wide plan that somehow or other ties in everything that has taken place over the last couple years. Sure, we keep hearing about these really super retreats that every writer comes out of pumped to continue to pull the wool over the readers' eyes, and yet, I can't help to feel cheapened by all this. Sure, we should really worry about what we're reading at a panel-by-panel level, and yet. And yet...

While we're on the whole WTF thing...

Radioactive sperm. Really? Not that anyone would take the bet, but $20 says they regret this much sooner than later. Marvel just can't seem to get their quasi-Elseworlds shit together. I probably, though no promises, wouldn't be as pissed were it not for the horrific track record. Bloody well commit if you don't want to look like a damn idiot. For the love of Zeus in Olympus, can't we at least kill a character without resorting to a dumb ass gimmick like...oh, I don't know...RADIOACTIVE SPERM!!!

Anyways, that's about all I can really stomach being pissy in the stomach concerning. Funny how a brief rant ends up significantly shorter than one of my “quick” reviews, eh? See you later on this week for some more review-ing goodness. As always, your overly friendly and slobbery,

cenTrale